“Solosexual is the first book to explore and celebrate a community that puts masturbation first.”
We’re really proud to announce the release of TBB contributor Jason Armstrong’s new book Solosexual: Portrait of a Masturbator. An unabashed memoir, a stirring manifesto and an investigation into living a life in which masturbation is one’s primary sexual outlet, Solosexual is provocative, personal and wildly arousing.
Within just a week of its release, the book hit #1 and #2 on Amazon Kindle in the Gay Studies and LGBT section respectively. Personally, I think it’s an important document of this time in our sexual revolution, where binary notions are flying out the window and individuals are defining their own sexuality.
Jason’s candid description of his bate-focused sex life delves into the intimate, private aspects of ourselves that many would find difficult to share. It’s a brave, thoughtful and extremely well-written analysis of his gradual acceptance of masturbation as an integral part of his life. From masturbation as a casual past-time to periods of full-on chronic edging for hours, Jason describes his love of self-love in compelling detail.
“For an edger, it’s the journey, not the destination. At that fifth, six, seventh hour of edging, I look in the mirror and see a naked man jacking his dick frantically reflected back at me. I’ve come to dearly love this sight, the image of me making love to myself with no inhibitions, no concern about my appearance. That man in the mirror has given himself over to the delicious power of his own sexuality… I have become my own lover.”
—SOLOSEXUAL, page 37
What inspired you to write Solosexual?
I was inspired by two things: Firstly, my own intense experience of masturbation and the journey it took me on. Masturbation for me feels like an amazing juxtaposition of transcendent bliss through the aching horniness of a hot blooded man. What could be better?
But my second inspiration was BateWorld.com. Here, I met other men for whom this experience was just as revelatory. My book is dedicated in part to all the men who shared their sexual journeys with me. I realized that for so many of us, our sexuality is not peripheral to our experience of being human, but for many, it’s central. And I wanted to honor that — in myself and in the community that has sprung from BateWorld. I think if I had read my own book when I was 20 and starting my sexual life, I might have saved myself some trouble.
When did you first hear the term “solosexual”? Did you embrace it immediately in relation to your bating?
My book is also in part dedicated to the man who introduced me to the word “Solosexual.” We had met through Xtube.com and he read my blog, which is ostensibly about sex with others, but he intuited that masturbation was central to my life. He suggested that I might be solosexual, to which I replied, “What the hell is a solosexual?” He explained and sent me the link to BateWorld. There, the curtains parted and I immediately felt that I was seeing a reflection of my true sexuality.
Do you have rituals around how you set up a bate session?
Yes, there is a quasi-religious aspect to how I prepare for a night of bating. I like music to be playing at the start, I pour myself a whiskey, light a smoke, set the lighting just so, open up BateWorld, open a few dirty tumblrs, and proceed to have that first grab of the crotch that I waited all day at work for. Lions roar and eagles soar at this point. And the night has only just begun…
What is the first thought you have once you complete a bate?
I almost always think to myself, “What a journey.” I call my bates divinely filthy, as I feel that I’m both touching the divine and yet it’s through the grit and grime of being a horny pig. Who would ever have thought those seemingly opposite notions could in fact entwine?
Would you have been able to write this book if you hadn’t found a community of other bators?
No. Before finding the bating community, I didn’t even have the language to understand my core sexuality. Without the language to describe it, we cannot know ourselves. My question for you is how did you come to create BateWorld? How did you know that you would fill a void for men like me?
Ha. Well, honestly, I don’t think either of us had any idea how many guys there were out there who were looking for a communal gathering spot. At first, the numbers just astonished me. Since the advent of online hookups, I’d been searching nudist sites for masturbators, but there had never been a place where I could expect that others were looking for bate buddies. So BateWorld filled that need for me. It was my business partner Peter’s idea though. It’s been an incredible ride. But back to you…
Can you please explain “Gooning”?
Gooning is that moment when you are so connected to your penis, your body, the pleasures that you are feeling, that you broach a higher consciousness. Many men will cock-babble at this moment, which is akin to speaking in tongues. You’re losing yourself and yet finding some other plane. This state of ecstacy can last a moment, or many minutes. You may or may not orgasm. It’s beyond that.
Do you have any specific bating fantasies?
I actually fulfilled one fantasy by attending a Healthy Friction event in Key West in October of 2015. All those men, openly bating at any time of day. Heaven!
Will there be a sequel to Solosexual?
It took me two years to write Solosexual, not because the writing itself took so much time, but I was living the experience and working it through in my head, you know what I mean? I truly think there will be a sequel as I grow into this bating lifestyle, along with my brothers on BateWorld, who are my tribe, my heroes.
Sweet. Thanks Jason!
READ MORE ABOUT SOLOSEXUAL
BUY SOLOSEXUAL AT AMAZON