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Ask The Batemaster: I Have Orgasms, But I Don’t Ejaculate

QUESTION: After prostate surgery, I’m lucky. I don’t ejaculate, though I sometimes ooze a little. I do have great erections and have wonderful orgasms, though. I’m 72 and in pretty good shape, so I wonder… can I still get fellows to masturbate with me on cam?

RESPONSE: Why not? You are fortunate, as results after prostate surgery and other treatments can vary a lot. As you probably know, recent evidence reveals that many cases of both prostatitis (enlarged prostate) and the more serious prostate cancer actually progress very slowly. So slowly, in fact, that most medical practitioners have backed off the kind of quick, aggressive treatments often pursued until quite recently. Still get checked at least yearly, even after you’ve been successfully treated.

The prostate contributes its fluid as one of the components of semen, and also acts as a pump, clenching in a series of spasms when you ejaculate (if you ejaculate) to help shoot semen from the penis. The prostate, about grape-sized in a teenager, keeps growing through life and becomes approximately walnut-sized by your 60s or 70s. The urethra passes through this gland that lies directly beneath the bladder, and that’s the route by which the bladder drains fluid into your penis and out the tip.

You have enjoyed a successful procedure and can still enjoy erections and orgasm, which are far more important than ejaculating semen, especially when you are not planning to reproduce. Quite understandably, many men are somewhat obsessed by and attached to the dramatic experience of ejaculation, when semen spurts and pours from the penis. However, many seriously dedicated masturbators (such as myself) choose not to focus on ejaculation, indeed we prefer semen retention. This allows a man to experience many dry orgasms and even multiple orgasms without losing your erection or your desire to continue playing.

Of course, this is similar to what many men call edging, focused on extended pleasure, short of that “edge” also called ejaculatory inevitability, from which there’s no going back, only the blissful, oblivious plunge into the abyss of orgasmic ecstasy. Perhaps you already pursue edging, or even semen retention to prolong and intensify your pleasure

There is no reason you should not be able to find playmates, guys who would like to masturbate with you on video conference or cam. A generous, enthusiastic attitude helps a lot. If the time comes when your playmate wants to ejaculate, you can simply tell him that’s fine with you, but you don’t plan to follow suit. There’s no need to tell him about the medical history involved unless you wish to. Sometimes guys are funny about this issue.

Personally, I very seldom ejaculate on cam (or off), and in my case (at least so far), it’s entirely by choice. The reason I got into this whole realm of encouraging male masturbation is that I wanted to be able to enjoy much longer, more intense penis pleasure. I wanted to be able to spend indefinite intervals savoring and relishing on and on how good it feels.

More power to you, Brother, and please continue to fully enjoy your masturbation practice, both in solo sessions and with other guys online. Self-confidence and experience count for a great deal.

The Bate Master - Bruce P. GretherBRUCE P. GRETHER is the “BateMaster”. Mr. Grether’s lifelong love of penises and masturbation has led him to achieve a level of mastery and understanding of masturbation that is at once unique and extremely rare. He is renowned for both his ability to achieve seemingly endless states of prolonged and intense masturbatory pleasure as well as his skill in passing this knowledge on to his students. Mr. Grether has made it his life’s mission to encourage men to take their practice of masturbation to new levels of personal enrichment and self-discovery.

Mr. Grether is a globally recognized masturbation activist, an accomplished masturbation coach, and a tireless facilitator of masturbation workshops. In 2001 he coined the now popular term “Mindful Masturbation”. He is the author of a best-selling book, The Secret of the Golden Phallus, plus the erotic fantasy novels The Moontusk Chronicles. His website can be found at

A note from The Batemaster: I’m honored that the guys at Bateworld have asked me to respond to some questions from male masturbators around the world every week.

Always check with your doctor about any issues you might be experiencing with your sexual organs. Prompt diagnosis and treatment are important. This article’s purpose is to inform and entertain readers and is not a substitute for medical advice or treatment.<

7 replies
  1. apalmer5
    apalmer5 says:

    Nice explanation about what the prostrate does & good advice too Bruce. Personally I think masturbation is a beautiful & selfish bit of pleasuring that’s totally just for us, our selfish sexual pleasures. For many it can be even more arousing to share it with others either in person or online with a cam or mic.

    And its totally up to you if you choose to confide with a cyber or sex partner about your surgery and you’ll be enjoying yourself immensely orgasm wise but there won’t a cum show. I’m willing to bet they won’t mind at all. Enjoy it! Bate away.

    • Bruce P. Grether
      Bruce P. Grether says:

      I don’t view “selfishness” as negative in this case, rather it’s self-awareness, and self-esteem. Thanks as always for your comment! – BPG

  2. Anonymous
    Anonymous says:

    As a frequent cammer, I know that ejaculation seems like a really important thing, and usually it’s established early in the session whether you’ll be cumming together. Personally, I’d be fine at that point with a guy saying “I’d love to orgasm with you, but I really don’t make much cum”. It may be a problem for some guys, but I think if you give that approach a try, you’ll find plenty of men that don’t really care and would still enjoy getting off with you.

  3. Stevie
    Stevie says:

    I have masterbated regularly for well over 40 years and although my cum volume has declined in recent years my pleasure and orgasm is still as intense. Masterbation is still extremely pleasurable and I’m always on the
    lookout for ways to enhance my experience.


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